7.03.2003

so, already, i'm thinking....

...that the differences between this platform and the blank paper that stares back at me from my journal are pretty significant in one glaring sense - i can't remember who to attribute the quote to, but someone once said that the act of observation itself distorts that which is being observed...boy, am i feelin' that now.

the thought of sitting down and scribbling something in a book that will go back into my backpack or onto a shelf is purging - cleansing, even...if the subject matter dictates that it be so. this, however, smacks of voyeurism to me in a way that i didn't expect.

the huge irony in that is that i've been a songwriter since high school...so writing thoughts down for others' perusal shouldn't feel foreign to me. but songs are crafted, honed and perfected...to some extent...before they're unleashed on the world. i suppose i could apply the same mindset here, but then why not just write a song? journalling, for me, was always supposed to be stream of consciousness...in order to be truthful, that was always a prerequisite...otherwise, harder truth runs the risk of distortion during the editing process.

"people never talk about their feelings anyway
without dressing them in dreams and laughter
i guess it's just too painful otherwise...."

jackson browne, "the late show"


so, as far as i'm concerned, there are no rules, there are no taboos, and whatever i write, you'll have to suffer through. if that's ok, then we can proceed from here.